Back then when I was in university, I had lots of dreams. I want to do this, I want to do that, I will not stop challenge myself, I will look for this, I will become this, etc, etc. But after I got a job, I stopped thinking outside the box. Even back then I was thinking about taking lots of course, right now it's all gone. I am staying for too long in my comfort zone and I know exactly how bad it is for my development.
I need motivation, encouragement, and I didnt get any from my surroundings. But whatever, I am me. I always get what I want. Now that u realized you want lots of things, try and get it!!!! U will do just fine.
Not so long ago, I started to like this guy. He was my former boss (he resigned 1 month after I got in), very intelligent, single, cute, and my qualification is nowhere near him. I used to be very proud of myself, my qualifications and all, but then I realized, that kind of pride only works in my hometown. Here I am nothing. I feel intimidated by him. He is very humble, kind, and much more superior than me. I used to just admire him, but now I want him or I want to be him, I am not too sure myself.
After he resigned, I tried to get to know him and he is very sweet I have to admit. But I think he does not feel the same affection as I feel, well it is expected. I am about 9-10 years younger, my family background is nowhere near his, I feel inferior when I am with him, his friends are all very fancy, while mine are well, normal. When I am with him, I feel like I am a little girl all over again. He makes me smile, he makes me see a figure I want to be, he inspires me. I dont know I like him or adore him or like him and adore him at the same time. I am not sure whether I want him or I want to be him.
I will not make this blog all about him, its all about me. Thanks to him, I am thinking to challenge myself. I have to try harder. I have to get whatever I wanted. Now just focus on what you wanted, go back to your diary, look at your long term dream, well achieve them all. After all, you are **** *******. And next time u be near him or his friends, show them who is the boss!!!!!
